A note from Dr. Farzana Badrun
A man sat in my office not long ago and told me, almost as an aside while I was writing up his visit, that he’d been having chest tightness for three weeks. Three weeks. He’d mentioned the thing he actually came in for — a cough — and was halfway out the door, before the real concern surfaced. I asked him why he hadn’t led with that. He shrugged. “Didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”
That shrug tells you most of what you need to know about how men tend to handle their own health.
Some of it is generational — the idea that a doctor’s office is for emergencies, not for the slow, quiet stuff: the fatigue that’s become normal, the weight that won’t budge, the mood that’s flatter than it used to be. Some of it is just discomfort. Sexual health, mental health, bathroom habits — nobody’s rehearsed how to bring those up casually, so they don’t get brought up at all.
Here’s what I actually want, plainly: bring me the thing you almost didn’t mention. The one you were going to save for “if it gets worse.” The fifteen pounds you’ve stopped trying to lose. Waking up as tired as when you went to bed. Your dad’s heart attack at fifty-five that’s never once came up at a checkup. Getting winded climbing the same stairs that never used to bother you.
If something needs attention — shortness of breath, urinary frequency, changes in sexual function, whatever it is — we deal with it directly, at the size it actually is. Not smaller, because you shrugged. Not bigger, because I’m trying to justify a visit.
You don’t need a crisis for this to count. You just need to say the thing you were about to leave out.
— Dr. Farzana Badrun
Medical Disclaimer: For important health information and limitations, please read our full Medical Disclaimer.
